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We're going through the archives and pulling out the best bits from the past year including:
Thanks for sticking with us while we take a short break!
Hang with us on socials to chat more noughties nostalgia - Facebook (@tminus20) or Instagram (tminus20podcast). You can also contact us there if you want to be a part of the show.
Transcript is generated automatically
The year is 2003. Tom is your first friend on Myspace, 50 Cent costs a dollar on iTunes. The Terminator becomes the Governator and nobody can find those weapons of mass destruction t -, 20, rewind, 20 years. With Joe and Mel.
Ohh yeah, we've hit that period in between Christmas and New Year. Well, we're not entirely sure what day it is, what we're supposed to be doing, or whether or not we're even supposed to go to work if if that's what we do during this time. But we are right now on T -, 20, the podcast where we rewind to this week in history 20 years ago. And if you thought I was a bit loose the last episode. Ohh my goodness. The Christmas New Year Hangover has kicked in well and truly, and it's even more of a mess with your host Joe and Mel. Hello, Mel.
Hello. Who am I? Where am I? How did you get my number? I don't know.
What's going on?
We've been married for over a decade. Just so you know.
It is a weird time, isn't it? Cause you just quite don't know. You don't you don't really know what day it is or what you should be doing, where you should be going. What's happening? Let's just eat. Just eat some more things.
Yeah, agree. And Speaking of leftover. That's basically what we're doing today. We're just giving you the leftovers from the last 12 months. We we did 1/2 last week. This week. We're doing the other half of our best. That's a strong word. Our better bits from the last 12 months, yeah.
Hopefully it doesn't affect your guts. You might need a Tums.
You may need a Tums. You may need gaviscon any of those. I don't want to endorse any particular brand of antacid, cause I find none.
My game.
So it's too effective. Sure. Well, it's cheap to you. Yeah, you can get it at the survey.
Quick case, quick case works.
Alright and got some good flavours too. So we're heading into New Years. It's the time 2003 you'd be getting your low rise boot cut jeans and you're going.
Yes, yes.
Out top, you'd. Probably be getting a spray tan. You'd be straightening your hair to within an inch of its life, yes. Spraying it glitter spray, maybe a bit of a crimp. That was 2000 and I think you had to buy tickets to go into Monica for those that live in Canberra, you needed to buy tickets in advance.
Ohh yeah for. New Year's Eve. Remember, we did that. We went into Monica for New Year's Eve. And it was. Dead New Year's Eve in Canberra is just like not a.
That was you didn't have to get.
The tickets, yeah.
Thing it's really.
Ordinary get out of town most. People are down in Batemans Bay and holiday.
John Bible, spine down the vine.
House, nothing's open. You can't even get a good restaurant feed new.
Year's is also a time, isn't there a lot of?
Movies that are released around, yes.
Well you got.
All the Boxing Day Christmas movies and stuff like that. And I actually, I've I've been looking at before we get into all the best bits, which we'll do in a SEC. I've been looking at the most anticipated movies for next year cause I'm like what's out, like well, what can we see and since COVID. The movie stuff has been pretty dry, and then you had to ride a. Stroke and all that sort of stuff. And I feel like. It's all a. Bit it's really. Ohh yes. Yes everything. Everything is either a remake or an idea that's been had before or part of a franchise. Nobody's having anything original. There's no original thought. OK, you're ready. So the most anticipated movies of 2024 on Rotten Tomatoes ready. January Mean Girls.
Every every.
What? What have we got? Yes.
They're remaking me. It's it's there you go remake.
You can't. Mean Girls? No. Ohh gosh.
Remake of Mean Girls? Yep, Yep. It's got John Hammond. Tina Feys in it as well. And a bunch of people that I don't know. February, February, Madam Webb, which is a spin off of Spiderman. It's another part of the franchisee franchise superhero film. How many superhero films are we gonna deal with? Then we go to March, June Part 2, which I'm actually looking forward to. Cause I like the first June movie and I'm looking forward to the second one.
Ohh, skin off. So is this yes.
So there, but. But but again, that's a remake, as Jane's been done before. It's it's it's it's part of a book. It's a franchise. Also in March, Kung Fu Panda, what are we up to for? Kung Fu panda is that. That's the Jack.
Black one, isn't it?
Like 4.
The first one.
Was good, but yeah, I think we're over. That by now, aren't we?
Yeah. So we're under another Kung Fu panda movie. Then we've got Ghostbusters, frozen empire, which is, I mean, franchise remake. I don't know. Lots of people like the recent. I'm. I'm not buying it. I'm not picking up what they're putting down. Then we go to. Mickey 17, which is a Bong Joon Ho film, which I'm actually looking forward to. He directed parasite the Academy of watering film Parasite, so I'm I'm expecting good things Robert Pattinson, Tony Colette, Mark Ruffalo, Stephen you, and it looks really good. Then in April we've got Godzilla versus Kong, the new Empire and I'm a sucker for a monster.
Ohh, I shan't be watching that then.
Film and a Godzilla Kingdom. Well, yeah. Superhero team up. Whatever. So I guess that's.
Monster Monster crossover. Hmm.
OK. Then we go to may and we've got the fall guy. Do you remember that series from the 80s? It's a remake of an 80s TV series. Yeah. So, Ryan, Ryan Gosling and Emily Blunt playing the fall guy. Then we've got Furiosa, the Mad Max saga, which is part of a franchise.
The full guy.
It sounds familiar. Haven't we finished the Mad Max sound good?
Yeah, I I am. I've seen the trailers recently for Furiosa, and while I'm looking forward to it, part of a franchise, then we've got Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes, which is a weird title. Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is a weird title, and the planet of the Apes is a remake obviously, and they remade it and did like a trilogy, and that was great. And now? They're doing another one. Do you do? You are you seeing. A trend here. There's no no original thought not.
Really lazy like yeah.
Give me something ******* new, please. Very lazy.
OK.
Hit June's bad boys 4. Do you? OK, do you?
Ohh nice.
Actually think that's gonna get? Mate. Or do you think it's gonna see the? Out of day. OK, then. Then we get inside out two.
Ohh, that's that animated movie. I loved that. Yeah, I loved that movie. But yeah, where do.
You go from there.
That's a sequel. And I cried. I cried. I can't shed.
You do I.
Any more tears for Bing Bong?
Don't bring that.
Up don't bring up Bing Bong. I'm sorry about ping.
Pong. OK, then we get. Despicable Me 4. Hmm. We get a quiet place day one, which again part of a franchise like we've done in quiet. Yeah, like this.
So there's nothing original. What? OK. So say you could remake any movie.
Any movie I don't want to what?
Movie, would you? Like to see we made and with whom?
None. None. No.
Why? If it wasn't a good movie to start with, don't remake it again.
Maybe they could improve. Maybe we could have a remake of Jilly called Smith, and we'll actually make money this time.
Ohh, I see what you're doing. There maybe that there need to be.
I think they should drive.
A lot of twisters remember Twister. So plural, they're they're. So there's a sequel, like how?
That's now. So there's more than one.
That sounds dangerous.
Many how many freaking years later? No, she's not.
Is Helen Hunt in it? I loved Helen Hunt. What was the TV show? She was in mad about you. I loved her in that and. I loved her in Project X with Virgil the.
Ohh, she was in.
Project she was the love interest of Matthew Broderick.
Backland movies were good. *** **** it.
Yes, remake Project X no, don't.
Make it think of something new.
We'll just re release it. Just re release.
I mean Kingdom of the you can put another movie, the monkeys, the Kingdom of the planet of the Apes. That's OK. But now you.
It I'll go and say that.
Can't even do that because of the quilting.
Apple, apple. I learned how to sign the. Word apple from that meeting.
Ohh cool. I thought you were talking about Chris Martin and Brian Paltrow's kid.
Apple, apple, apple.
OK, Deadpool three. Ohh, OK. Then we go to August Borderlands, which is a *** **** video game movie. Yeah, there's an untitled alien movie apparently coming.
Isn't that a computer game? Yes.
Out in August. First Craven the hunter? Well, that's another Marvel movie called like more Marvel movies. Awesome. September Beetlejuice 2. Yeah, Beetlejuice 2. Tim Burton's coming back? Yeah, maybe. But again, it's a sequel. Like, come on, then we've got Transformers one. Yeah. Transformers one. And I think Chris Hemsworth is playing.
Remotely interested.
Systems prime in that whatever. Then we've got the sequel to Joker with like in Phoenix and Lady Gaga in October. Right then we've got Venom 3. In November. Gladiator 2? Yeah, apparently they're going to do another karate kid movie in December, and then maybe a Lord of the Rings movie or a TV show in December as well. And then, like, a Lion King. Movie called Mufasa and then Sonic the Hedgehog 3 and then Nosferatu. And it's just all too much. Like there's there's nothing that has not been done before in that list of films for 2024.
I think someone should back customer service investigations.
Well, any I I mean, how hypocritical am I? Because we're just gonna play you a whole bunch of that. We've already done. So enjoy. It's pretty obvious that Saddam Hussein is gonna reject that exile option. He's like he's.
No deal.
Like there is. No way. I am listening to Bush. I'm staying. And he does. Here in Australia. This I love this. This is one of my favourite moments, Leon and and I I it's funny because at the time there was such backlash. They're like, how dare these? It will do this up there, this monument, this National Monument, get defaced. And I'm always ohh like a bit of graffiti. I think it's great. So the no war slogan gets put up on the Sydney Opera House by protesters after Prime Minister John Howard announces that he's gonna commit troops to any American LED.
So much outrage.
War against Iraq.
It was a sparkling Sydney Morning, giving the two protesters a perfect backdrop to paint their message before the eyes of the world. Just before 9 they scaled the outside of the largest sale and had 20 minutes to do their handy work in thick red paver paint. The two men blocked a door with access to the peak. Forcing police rescue to climb to the top.
It was all very friendly, obviously at a height like that, you don't muck around with.
Anybody's life 33 year old David Burgess and 42 year Old English national doctor Will Saunders were charged and released on conditional. Fail. Both were unapologetic.
Our Prime Minister is about to go and maliciously damage a whole nation.
I'll ask you all again. What will you do today to stop the war?
And like they just did what they thought they could. I think they were so frustrated and they saw an opening and they. Went for it.
And listening back those words. Are so powerful, aren't they? What are you going to do? To stop the war.
Yeah. And look what they did. I I loved how. Pronounced and how? Much that stood out that that red paver paint on the big pure white sail of the Opera House. It was stunning.
And so dangerous, too, they climbed up the outside of the sails, and they had this big long paint roller, and they were kind of painting it upside down. Imagine if you spelled it wrong or had one of the letters around the wrong way.
I I do wonder. You know how we're talking about birthday cards, and you can make a mistake on this fellow. I wonder if they practised at home a couple of times before they actually.
Wouldn't you be embarrassed?
Yes, yes, what?
Or maybe bought some white paint as well, just in case.
Yeah, just. Well, I don't think they would have had the luxury of time. And and I can remember the time and look, I think my opinion on these guys has changed over time as well because I remember everyone was disgusted. Ohh, how could they deface? It's an act.
So they could. Go over it. So stressful and to.
Of terror. It's some.
Yes, did refer to it that way, yes.
People were flaming, framing it as terrorism. And I'm like, oh, I'm so terrorised by the words, no war. Painted on the Opera House, say. Come on.
There was so much outrage and I don't ever recall hearing those guys being interviewed at the time and hearing those words either they.
Yeah, no.
Sort of.
Yeah, they had a chat to them, but they kept that all behind the scenes and too busy kind of outraged wowser ring about the fact that they're deface. The Opera House and interestingly, you look now at the Opera House and I believe with the recent war in Ukraine, weren't they lighting it up different colours in support and they're that now actually using it as a way to.
They've projected many a thing on there, you know? Yep.
Show support for for various causes and things that are going on in the world. So isn't that.
Ohh, like those guys did it. First they're Trail Blazers then at well at the time it was a it was a waste of police resources. And you know we're trying to fight a War on Terror and we gotta deal with these petty criminals and all that sort of stuff. But it could have been worse like over in Denmark.
Yes, they should get Commission royalties.
Protesters threw red paint at their Prime Minister, Anders Fogh Rasmussen, for his pro US stance shortly before a press conference. They just went all out with buckets, paint through at him instead of maybe they didn't have an opera. House. I don't know.
And this one.
I had to.
Do a little bit of research on.
Why is that?
Blowing me up. Open brackets with her love blow bracket.
Excuse me.
What's it? By JC Shazam. Is that how you say it's chase chases?
Chess is, I don't know.
I think it's chase. He's.
OK.
Have it. Yeah, play it.
Just don't like riding.
That sounds very timber Lakey timber, timber. Timber Lakey is he is.
And do you? Why?
Know what is he? He's an. Is he an?
It sounds timber, timber, timber. Lanky.
In sinker, is he the in sinker that we were? Talking about or we were, yeah.
He is? Yes. So this. Is where I had to get. My Smee on board.
Your subject matter expert, please do not use anymore acronyms from here on in.
So I had a chat to. My subject matter expert Christina. Now she hosts a podcast. Called ready to fall, which is all about ENC.
It's completely dedicated to *NSYNC.
It's amazing. So if you're an *NSYNC. Fan get around it.
You. Yeah, just wallow in it. Like, really just. Like it's like a big warm blanket full of end sink that you could just pull right over your head and immerse yourself in, yeah.
Of and so yes, anything like an amazing because I don't know a lot about JC and I was listening to that thinking that sounds very Justin. And then I watched the video clip and Tara Reid was. In the video clip.
JC better not be an acronym.
There was just.
There was.
Jesus Christ.
There was so much going on and it was. From his debut studio album, which? Was released a. Little bit after justified and the album.
JC Chasez's yes, jazz, jazz, jazz, jazz. OK.
The album.
Was called schizophrenic and he is wearing a straight.
Oh. Oh, wow. That's yeah, that wouldn't fly today.
Jacket on the cover. That didn't. That didn't date well.
No, I don't think it would have done too well back then. Umm.
So I asked.
I I don't.
Think people had too much of a problem, so I asked Christina about it and. She said that she bought it.
Christina from the ready to Fall podcast? Yep.
Yes, she said she wasn't overly impressed at the time, but she's gone back and listened to it and and retrospectively. Quite. Likes that song, but if.
You go.
Down the wormhole or the rabbit hole or. Dig a little. Deeper apparently there's this whole thing and controversy. Justin versus Jay sees releases and how JC was robbed and didn't get the promo that Justin did. Cause I think they're both on.
Zomba, just like a sliding door moment like they could have gone one way. It could have been Tibet, Tibet, Timberlake. Or it could have been JC Chasse.
I went. I went with the beatboxer because I think as well and again, I don't, I don't really know. I like *NSYNC, but I don't know that much.
Ah, that's unfortunate.
About them umm. He also does vocals and a lot of people have said over the years that his vocals are more superior than. To Timberlake.
Well, that wouldn't be hard.
And he's quite he's quite the songwriter, so.
Is Kenny beatbox though.
Ohh, maybe that's that was his downfall. No beatboxing, but yeah, they were. They were released very close together, but they did Justin's first Zomba. Yep, zomba. Which is, which was jive as well. I think it was on Zomba too.
Right, yeah.
Same label, same record label. Yeah. So the poor. Dude has basically been affected by a over the table boardroom decision.
Well, yeah, I think he's got delays. He's there, there's documentaries on it. What? There's documentaries about it. And I was reading the thread and people are very passionate. I think there is a movement called Justice for JC. There's a Facebook group.
According to the the the theory, the conspiracy theory. Justice for JC there was look, there was a movement about 2000 years ago with JC, but they crucified him anyway.
The 1st of May. Yeah. George W Bush gives his famous infamous mission accomplished speech on the 1st of May. This is six weeks after he announced the invasion of Iraq.
Thank you all very much. Admiral Kelly. Captain card. Officers and sailors of the USS Abraham Lincoln. My fellow Americans. Major combat operations and Iraq have ended. In the Battle of Iraq, the United States and our allies have prevailed. And now our coalition is engaged in securing and reconstructing that country. In this battle, we have fought for the cause of liberty and for the peace. Of the world. Our nation and our coalition are proud of this accomplishment. Yet it is you. The members of the United States military who achieved it.
Yeah. So I just said.
The same Bush.
Arrives in a jet that lands on an. Aircraft carrier was.
Was it a Jenner? A?
Chopper. No, it was a jets it.
It's a jet like a Harrier or.
Was very theatrical. It was very.
Something like a veto.
It was very OTT. He was criticised for it being so OTT because normally he comes in, he does come in a chopper.
Yeah, it was. It's it's happened.
No, he's gone for the jet landing.
Well, yeah, and but and he had the flight suit on and everything and the helmet. He looked like like the final scene in Top Gun.
Was quite the stunts. Yes, yes, he said. He seemed dressed, yes. And and then you'll you. Might remember this one. There was a he gets up on. The podium and behind him. Is a massive banner that says Mission accomplished, which is why it's called the mission accomplished. She doesn't actually say doesn't actually say the words, but this big banner is behind him the whole time. But to recap the speech, he was saying the major combat operations have ended in the battle and our allies United States and our allies have prevailed because the regime is no more.
With the the red.
White and blue? No, he.
So it was. Basically a victory speech.
Well, it was it. It was also bull.
It was complete and utter ********.
So the USS Abraham Lincoln that he's parked on, that he he parked the jet on and he came out in the flight suit. They had all the cameras in the media there that was parked, parked. Do you park a ship?
You reverse parallel park. That would be difficult.
I don't, I don't. Freaking know. Ohh. Hang on. I've just gotta back up a little bit. Do a three point. Turn I look.
Ah grace.
I don't know, but the USS Abraham Lincoln, that was the the vessel that. He was on, I believe.
I don't know. Was that cheers one.
No, no, that was the Missouri. I'm pretty sure it was the USS Abraham Lincoln. Yeah, it was.
OK.
That was parked.
I don't know.
What the word is anchored, Maude anchored. I don't know. Off the coast of San Diego. Ohh. It was nowhere near Iraq. It wasn't in the Persian Gulf. It was nowhere. It's not. It's not like he went across and and gave everyone a pat on the back and said thanks for doing a great job over here in Iraq. It's perfectly safe for me to enter here. Mission accomplished.
It wasn't doing anything over.
There it came back.
It's like I'm just gonna. Fly to San Diego and and then maybe visit Palm Springs on the way home. Do a round of golf, take in some sunshine, have a couple of Mai tais like it was utter.
I might go to the zoo while I'm there.
Bull like. I can't. I can't stress how. Bull it it was.
Yes, it was criticised by people who pointed out that the war was hardly over.
No. Well, look.
Was gaining pace at this point, and the vast majority of casualties, both US and Iraqi, military and civilian, they occurred after this speech happened. They fought in Iraq. For eight more years.
Yeah, it's one of those. I know it's one of those ones where you could make it. This didn't age well. Meme like this is, like the epitome of not ageing well.
This was six weeks in. He gave a victory speech a few weeks into the fifth longest war in American his.
Straight what? Ohh my goodness Oh my.
Goodness. So they were.
Copying a lot of Flack about mission accomplished, the big vinyl banner, the White House said. Ohh. No, no, no, no, no, not us. The the people on the boat asked specifically for the banner. They gave us a call.
No vinyl banners. For the. The vinyl. They blame the sailors for the von Vanna.
Because they because they they didn't have the right equipment to make their own banner, didn't have any crate paper or any yoho sticks on the. Quotes so they. Allegedly called the White House that we need a mission accomplished banner of the White House went short. This is what?
We got you.
The White House says.
We're the white.
House this is what we do. You need a. Banner. We got your banner.
Later, the administration and naval sources.
People, all the boats.
Said no, that was not our idea.
It was somebody's idea.
Yeah, the white. House, we just helped them hang it when they got there.
So nobody wants to take credit for the banner.
I think the White House later released a statement saying that look the banner and the visit, they're they're actually talking about the initial invasion of.
Iraq, you got it wrong.
Yeah. Ohh you should accomplish for the. So it was invasion accomplished. So they kind of got the wording wrong. Did we say mission? We meant invasion.
Apparently, Donald Rumsfeld got a copy of the speech in advance of bushes speech, and he crossed out any use of the phrase. Mission accomplished.
Right.
You did some editing, do some redacting.
So did actually say.
Mission accomplished in the speech, allegedly from what I've read.
Oh really?
And he crossed it out with Red Pen. He said I was in Baghdad. I was given a draught of that thing to look at and I just died. And I said, my God, it's too conclusive. I fixed it up and I sent it.
You're not wrong.
Back they fixed the speech, but they didn't. Fix the sign.
How imagine Rumsfeld's like you, could you? Ohh, my God. Like he would have been watching that and and the and the the sign is is directly in shot behind George W When he's standing at the podium after they've got all the footage of him getting off the vet toll, you know, in the flight suit with the helmet cause he's he unzips that and gets out of the flight. And then stands at the presidential podium and the the mission accomplished thing is directly in the. Background Rumsfeld would have.
You would have just meant what the hell?
Ohh so bad.
What are you thinking and just?
Blaming the the poor people on the. Boat for the sign.
I think Bush had regrets about that in hindsight. I mean he's he's he's been pretty vocal in hindsight with a lot of stuff. History has probably been a little bit kinder to him because there's been worse presidents, so. It's, but I think in like 2008, just after the election, when Obama won, he he did say that he regretted using that banner.
He actually referred to the banner.
Yeah, it was. Like the banner? Yeah, he's like he. He was in an interview with seeing him. And he's like, it's a summit said. Well, Bush thinks the war in Iraq is over. When I didn't think that, and it conveyed the wrong message. Yeah, well, buddy, it's.
That's that.
I you know what The thing is is like?
Should have checked your.
Banner First mate.
Look, I just. I I love the United States of America. We went there on our honeymoon. It's one of the best countries. In the world I love, the food, I love the people.
Are amazing.
I know, and I know that they're all still kind of hurting after September 11. But and and the thing with Americans is they don't do anything by halves. And I remember distinctly in 2003, just going look, guys, I'm just getting a little bit sick of you.
Which is.
Too much. It was too much. It was.
Just it and and. The rest of the you wait. The rest of this. Podcast you'll see. And you know what we're laughing about things here and we're kind of lampooning it. But on a very serious note, people have died. Like lots of people died.
$50.
And it's nothing against the the military, either, who go out and they they risk their lives. They put their lives on the line to protect freedom. So look, absolutely nothing against that. And war is complicated. It's not as simple as just saying no war. There's so much that goes on.
No, not at all.
Behind the scenes and there's there's so many complexities like I can't even begin to explain. I don't even understand myself. But ultimately innocent people are dying. People are putting their lives on the. Line there is that there. Is a a seriousness to it, but then you. See something like that this. This parading around and this landing on the ship in theme. And the big banners and you just go what?
That's right.
We do have some more. News and some devastating news.
It was a different time. Yes, yes. A time of a time of.
Actually, it was a different time and I think.
We need to acknowledge that.
Creeks, 15 year old guys.
Lots of crying, too many emotions, love triangles.
Girls named Joey. Boys named pacey.
Hmm, what are we talking about? Dawson's Creek ended.
Great, right?
This week, 20 years ago.
Want to know right now?
I didn't wanna wait for their lives to be over either. I was hoping for some cataclysmic thing where they could just write the whole series into oblivion.
Ohh, the American teen drama series about the lives of a. Close knit group. Of friends in the fictional town of Capeside, Massachusetts. Yeah. Beginning in high school and continuing into college, the series starred James Vanderbeek, Katie Holmes, Joshua.
Jackson and Michelle will.
Debut 20th of January 1998. Ran until the 14th of May 2000 and three 128 episodes.
Oh, that's a hefty binge.
Don't shoot. I never actually watched it because I think I stopped watching this sort of stuff after party of five because there's too much crying. There's too many emotions and this looks like it was. One of those.
There's a lot of that. The Dawson crying thing is is pretty renowned. I I endured it.
You watched.
Yeah, but I like Fred Durst. I did it all for the.
Ohh right, you had a lady friend who?
Unfortunately, yeah, yeah. Did it work? I.
Was a fan.
I don't know. No, actually it probably made things worse because I would sit through the show and just. Like grunt and groan and.
And she'd be like Lord Dawson. I'm Joey.
Yeah, grand grown through the show. And then there was no grunting and groaning afterwards. As a result. And I'm sorry to. I don't want to tell that story to my wife.
Oh, that's a shame, isn't it sad?
Let's keep going.
Through that? Ohh, that's disappointing. So I don't know.
Yeah, thankfully thankfully I ended up with you.
I I'd ask you for a synopsis, but I think it would be accurate. So Harrison Mooney of the Vancouver Sun. Because I wanted to know if Dawson owned to the Creek, cause the Dawsons Creek and the. Guys called Dawson so.
Yeah, it's like like. They meet me down at Dawson. 'S Creek, right? Yeah.
Yeah, is at his Creek. Harrison Mooney are the Vancouver Sun. Dawson's Creek gets its name from the teen dramas primary antagonist the weepy, mopey Dawson Leary who lives near a Creek. It's not actually his Creek, but for the purposes of the show, it may as well be because he spends a lot of. His time. Weeping and moping there. And I think that's a good sign. Helps us. He's crying by his Creek. That's not actually his Creek and. That's the story.
Yeah, it might be. The Creek actually became a Creek because it filled up with these Tees.
Philtre it's a ohh, maybe it is Dawson's Creek. Then it's his tears in a in a pool of water. So what is he? He's a filmmaker or something and he's got the friend Joey and she rows the boat over his Creek of tears and climbs up a ladder and goes into his bedroom. And they're like BFF's and they sleep in the same. But then they become teenagers and it just becomes too much because it's like feelings and ooh, urges, awkward. And then some other chick comes to town and she's hot. And then he likes her. And then there's this love triangle for leg, I don't know, four years until 128 episodes of love triangle. That's the synopsis.
And she ends up hooking up with his best mate. Yep. 128 episodes.
Yeah, yeah.
But yeah, this week, 20 years ago, we had the final. Episode do you?
Whoa, whoa, wait, stop. How old? Was Dawson's supposed to be?
15 wasn't he, 15? Was he 1515? I don't know. I didn't watch it. I think he.
He was. At the start of the show.
Was 15. That's what the guy said, yes.
Ohh James Vanderbeek was about looking 45.
Right.
I don't think he's 45. I think he's in his 20s. He certainly was not 15. They got a bunch of people in their early 20s playing people in their mid teens. Ohh, it's it's. Yeah. Yeah. It's so much worth some.
So it's like 90210.
Been done before.
So so do. You remember our website called Television without.
Is that yes, kind of.
It was synopsis. It was kind of snarky. Yeah, they do. They do reviews of TV shows that actually started out as Dawson's rap. So it was someone by the name of Sarah Bunting. And she started Dawson's rap, I think it.
Gathing reviews.
Was a blog or a forum?
Right.
And it was snarky recaps.
She just hated on the show.
That were absolutely hilarious. And then it evolved into this whole website called Television Without Pity. And then they'd recap other shows. But it really was her Dawsons Creek. Recaps that everybody loved, so I I feel like it's only fitting on this week, 20 years ago. It's the final episode. Perhaps you could indulge us with her final snarky recap of Dawson's Creek. Could you do that for us?
OK, here we go.
What is that?
That is the instrumental version of the Dawson's Creek theme, as played by Root Boy Germs. Ohh good, which we have this approach appropriated for the podcast. So here we go. Here's the here's the.
Thank you to Paul James.
Said it's it was called all good things, I believe.
I think Part 1, yes.
And this is from what was this TV with TV? Without what? What's the the, the television without pity? OK, here.
Two part finale, part one. Television without pity.
We go all. Good things, as if there's nothing shocking about this episode which allegedly takes place five years from now, even though everyone still looks and acts exactly the same.
Which is to.
Say badly coiffed and irritating, especially Dawson, who is about 3515 years old, everyone who was hoping he would be the one of these four friends who took a dirt nap. Will be sorely disappointed and yet not even the tiniest bit surprised by who actually is about to croak. There's a spoiler alert here. OK, just in case you wanted to binge Dawson's Creek. OK, great. Hint. That character's name rhymes with Jen. And is Jen. Sorry, this is late kids. My VCI decided sometime last week to stop recording anything but I didn't find that out until Sunday when I sat down to write my recap. So Sayers mailed me her copy and it got to my door. All sort of like smashed and but I sat down with a common dinner fork. Fork people and sort of reassembled it. I am the MacGyver of Recappers here, so here we are. The end at long, sweet last. OK, let's finish this thing. Part 2 must come to an end. God help us.
Do you get it? So part one of the two part finale, all good things. So two must come to.
Man quality riding quality Jen dies and yes, people I cried. I'm not made of stone. OK? She bequeaths baby Amy to Jack and because everyone must learn a lesson from Jenny's tragic death. Doug comes out of the closet to admit that he loves Jack and he's ready to be a parent.
Amazing. Amazing.
Wow. Dawsons Creek very ahead of its time, meanwhile. Dawson and Joey are great music stopped. Meanwhile, Dawson and Joey agree that they'll be together forever. But simply as friends. Ohh the the whole show. OK, like I.
Oh, disappointing.
They needed to end with a ****.
No, the whole show it, they should have just called it friend zoned, cause the whole thing is like Dawson and Joey. Are they or aren't they? No, they're not. They're never going to. He's been perpetually friends. Dawson and Joey agree they'll be together forever, but simply as friends, rather than in any kind of sexual or romantic way. I mean, if you're gonna be together forever, you might as well, you know, get one away every now. And then right? Why not? Instead? Dawson goes back to his one true love himself. OK, his television show and Joey and. Lacey, end up as they should. Together. Ohh, shut up. You got misty too.
Wow, that was beautifully read. I think you had the just the right ratio of snark to a little bit of emotion because, you know, we have come to the end and someone died.
That is too much, do you reckon?
And yeah, that's good. I appreciate that.
I don't want to wait for our. Lives to be over, I guess.
Netflix has acquired the rights to.
It as of a couple.
Of years ago. So if you wanna relive. The magic all. Over again you can catch it on Netflix, but if you want to relive television without pity, I found it. It's on the way back. Machine. Jump into the Wayback machine and go to like 2001 and you'll.
Yeah, that's much better than reliving Dawsons. I would rather administer paper cuts to the eye.
Find all the three caps.
Then watch that show.
Have a brand new entry into the top five in at #5. A single called can't let you go by a fabulous fabulous not fabulous fabulous F AB0L 0US. I'm assuming I'm assuming it's fabulous. Fabulous.
By who?
How do you spell that?
You said.
No, you're assuming it's fabulous. I'm assuming it's fabulous. Everything is fabulous. It's, you know what? I feel like the pronunciation from this particular artist comes after you've been to the dentist and you've had the numbing needle. How do you feel? I feel humbleness.
Can't let you go.
Colour and the colour was fabulous. Here we go.
We wanna be with you.
Geez, I'm glad I. Didn't have to back an answer that back. In the day that was.
I don't like that.
Can't let you go by fabulous.
I need you in my life, but I've already got a wife. I don't like that nasty, very nasty.
Ohh, he's yeah. I don't like him either. Yeah, not that fabulous now. No, no.
Teachers Mike Shorey and Lil Mo, produced by Just Blaze. Ohh.
Just blaze. Just blaze. Ohh, I've.
Just this, yes.
Heard that person? Yeah. Name dropped. I didn't know that was a person. I just thought it was a somebody who's throwing a statement out there.
No me either.
It's like ohh like and if anything is possible in the world of hip hop like.
Isn't it?
You could just. You could, like, yell something out, like fart in the wind and you're like, ohh, that's actually that's a person. Ohh I was hanging out with him the other day. I was having a drink with fart in the wind down at.
My new label.
The everything was going fabulous.
That is, the second single from Fabulous's album Street Dreams. I don't remember that song, but the third single from this album I do remember quite like this one.
More in the flash and I would have traded it all and all the.
They're fabulous.
Like that he would be good for remember there was that style of wrapping that was called slurring. I think that's what Nelly does with.
Mumble wraps like the mumble wraps and.
No, the nearly the. Slurring ur fullest ones, I think that's called slurring. I feel like fabulous. Should have done more slurring stuff.
Ohh yeah yeah yeah.
Really. What's the name of the drug that they give you at the dentist to make your mouth numb? I. Feel like they should have called it. That I don't know.
But when I was. A kid? Yeah. I never got that. Did you ever get that? I feel like getting a needle. When you go to the dentist.
I'm adding to my search history. I wanna find out what it's. Called I feel.
Like when you went to the dentist as a kid, like back in the 80s.
Epinephrine. It's epinephrine wrapping fabulous with these epinephrine wrapping.
You did. Did you ever get a needle when you got? A filling.
Ohh they.
No, and you filled every scrape, didn't you? That's only a new thing. Or maybe it's when. You've got baby teeth, you. Don't get.
They tortured us. I'm. I'm.
A needle. I feel like they tested cause every time I went to the dentist as a kid. I'd come out with. A feeling and I thought I never had a sore tooth. I think they were just using. For testing and. I'm learning how to do feelings because like all those teeth are.
Gonna come out anyway? Umm.
They were basically Nazi scientists. They were dentists in the 80s. The school dentists in the 80s. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, fabulous with his epinephrine rap.
Sorry to.
Dental health. Clinics, but I'm suss.
We had a reality TV. Series debut this week, 20 years ago as. Well, on the 20th of May. A American's Next Top Model? Yeah, abuse, abbreviated to A&TM and Top Model.
It's the series and.
Interactive competition, where a number of aspiring models compete for the title of America's next top. Model and a. Chance to begin their career in the modelling industry.
What you used to do to say get that you do not have what it takes to be America's Next Top Model is that.
Yeah, no roses. Just the harsh.
That you do not have what it? Makes just those words you do not have.
Reality, the harsh reality coming from Tyra, Tyra Banks, she created it.
What it takes? Tyra Banks. Well, did she I? Didn't know she was the creator of the show.
She's the creator of.
The show, and they're not called seasons, they're called cycles.
Course, of course.
They're called cycles. I've it doesn't feel right, does it cycle? No, it just feels like every four weeks.
I don't like that. So you're putting a bunch of girls in a.
In it it's.
Is going to be a bad time.
Gonna be a bad. In a dormitory, in a dormitory. And it's. And they're going. Through a cycle.
Yes, they're all going through a cycle together.
That's is that that can't. That's ohh, that's shocking.
8 each cycle has somewhere between 9 and 16 episodes, depending on the number of contestants.
How many episodes do you have in a cycle?
Can I ask that I feel really. Yeah. OK.
Many, many, many episodes, when you start asking you 21 questions. And it starts the the number of contestants at the start has varied over the years, but usually between 10 and 16. And then one gets eliminated each week. So.
Yeah. Yeah, they do.
Not have what it takes to be America's Next Top Model.
They're judged weekly on their overall appearance, participation in challenges, and then they do a photo shoot each week, which is generally. Themed loosely on the theme, and they're all given different characters to play within the theme. And then they're photos judged by the judgings Hannah.
Doesn't doesn't park the the. Doesn't park. I don't know if parks. I don't know if any of them even have them. Probably aren't even old enough to have their have their licence. It doesn't pass. The woke test is what I'm trying to say this show and.
Not the way that they're picked apart the photos, the things that they. Yeah, the way in which they're described, the things that.
The things that he said.
I remember there was one model who would have been, I don't know what size she was, but she kept. Being referred to as plus. Size. She would be probably 1/4 of the. Size of me she was.
It feels like. As skinny as.
Not she was not my size. And then they did a challenge where they had to dress as animals and they made her an elephant.
My thigh, yeah.
Jesus Christ.
It's horrible. You know what? I I remember, I didn't watch a lot of the show, but I do remember watching the soup back in the day on the E network with Joel McHale. And there was Tyra Banks, was featured in lots of segments. I feel like he was on to before anyone else, and she is a rampaging.
That's not OK.
Narcissist like she is the if you. If you were gonna write a textbook on narcissism, she is exhibit A. That woman, she. Just too much.
And you think early 2000s she was.
She was hailed as a hero because.
There was all that stuff in the 90s where there was a lot of tabloid about her and Naomi Campbell having this this war with each other. Yeah. And it was all it was all Naomi. Naomi was horrible to Tyra. Yeah. And she said. All these horrible things. She stopped her from booking jobs. She just basically sabotaged her career. This was the narrative in the 90s. Yeah. And then Tara, Tara has the talk show. I don't know when the. Talk show came out, I think. It was around the same time and then she.
The same. I think she was. Was like. Gonna be like a younger version of Oprah. Remember she made her debut in that film. Higher learning. That's where I first saw. She's like the girlfriend of Malik. Yeah. Yeah. Hmm. And she's beautiful. So beautiful. Like.
Yes, I.
Forgot about that.
That's right. And so then she starts. She starts Next Top Model and she is and much like idol casting people and giving them this opportunity to be a model that they wouldn't otherwise have and then score this modelling contract.
Is they get representation and yeah.
So she was kind of this big hero of the early 2000s. Look at what she's doing and very diverse range of contestants as well that featured on the show, which was quite groundbreaking at the time. I think it inspired a lot of other reality shows, like RuPaul's Drag Race, but like. You say recently. They they whacked it up on Netflix. I think it was during the pandemic during lockdown. So a lot of people like ohh this will be good. Let's go back and watch Queen Tyra Queen and her amazing her amazing Next Top Model show and people start watching it going.
Yeah, yeah.
Tyrus see this is.
Yeah, bit of a rethink on the shows legacy, it's dark.
It's dark, it's we've gone dark. Like it's not a it's not a positive show, it's.
Horrible. She's horrible.
All these people were going into it thinking this is gonna be great. Binge can't wait. Can't wait to watch.
This yeah.
And she wasn't really the the modelling industry's fairy godmother. She made herself out. Let's start with the time she told off Tiffany.
Oh, she's a wicked witch of the West.
I have never. In my life, the other girl like this. When my mother yells at this, it's because she loves me. I was rooting for you. We were all rooting for you. How dare you learn something from this and you go to bed at night. You lay there, you take responsibility for yourself because nobody's going to take responsibility for you. You rolling your eyes and you act like this cuz you've heard it all before. You've heard it all before. You don't know where the hell I come from. You have no idea what I've been through. But I'm not a victim. I grow from it and I learn. Take responsibility for yourself.
Shaking after that. But like I'm I want to be very careful about how I joke around about this, but at what stage in the cycle do you reckon? That was? Just curious, I don't. I'm tippy towing around it.
Day 25 for sure. Day 24.
Do you reckon she needs a heat pack or? Ohh foot massage. I don't know. No, just be quiet. OK, quietly leaving the.
I love it with Tiffany too, because.
Room backing out. Because it it was.
Another one of those shows where they love a back story. They love a back story. They love making the contestants cry. Tiffany had had a hard life and Tiffany had had anger management issues that Tyra had spoken to. About Tiffany, you know, well done with your anger management issues also Tyra.
Yeah. And then she tyres just snapped.
Yes, and just.
Well, she's very scary.
There's she's acting. She's acting there for sure, stupid.
I think she might be.
Tease and everything.
Because the other the. Other judges cause. I was watching their faces sitting behind.
Her. They're just sitting there. Just sit her. Yeah, just tired.
Umm. Other she's gonna, like, throw a? Shoe at her.
Standard Tara. Yeah, sure. No worries, no.
Or something time.
Seemed no I've been.
Bothered by this?
Then there was the makeovers, and this was the worst, because they'd always do something. To one of the girls just to see if they'd go through it. I remember the first season they made a girl shave her head and she had the most beautiful heck squished hair and.
Ohh yeah, I do remember that, yeah.
She agreed to it because she wanted. To win the Dang show, she is sitting there while they're giving her a buzz cut, openly sobbing and just crying with her.
I don't, they're.
Practically holding a gun to their head and the gun is you're from this poor socioeconomic background.
Yes, you will never get an opportunity like Fairy Godmother. Tyra here is giving you. You will shave your hair off that you have been.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Growing and looking after and man cause it was long hair. It wasn't short hair. It was long, beautiful hair.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yep.
And they shaved it. Off what a?
Bunch of horrible, horrible people.
Then there was the.
6th cycle, one of the worst.
Danny Evans gets in trouble. Because she wouldn't let them. Close her tooth gap.
So Danielle, you went to the dentist, but you refused to have your gap closed. Do you really think you can have a cover girl?
With it.
Contract with the gap.
In your mouth? Yeah, this.
Why not?
Is all people saying easier? He's beautiful colour girl, it's. Not marketable, yeah.
Just a little bit, it's OK.
Completely close it. Well, I guess she just left a gap wide open for another girl, baby.
I agree.
I'm sorry, but what a bunch of kicking that's now going horrible people.
Fast forward to a few cycles later. Yeah, and they actually got a gap added to another sentence. Teeth.
Like and OK, this is.
Ohh so it's marketable now. Four years later, we're comfortable.
You think?
With the gap mind, the gap isn't that terrible.
It's repulsive. It's so repulsive. It's. Think about some of the more famous models these. Days and the their point of difference, right is there is whatever's unique about them. So like, something like a tooth gap, for example, is a massive point of difference, you know. And here these guys are trying to send this kid practically a child, yes, to the dentist, to physically alter themselves.
Yeah, yeah.
Saying you are not good and you are not good. Enough you will close. That tooth gap. And interestingly, over the years, Tyra has spoken about how bullied she was by Naomi Campbell and the horrible things that Naomi had said to her, and how she was victimised by Naomi. Yet she is going to sit there and and tell someone that they're not good enough because naturally they have a gap in their teeth that they have to get. Fixed or that's the end. Of your time on the show, yeah.
How dare you? You know there was. There was. There was one on there. I can remember as well where it was a a gay girl was. On the show, and she was saying to. You like? We get that you're gay, but you don't need to keep flaunting your sexuality everywhere, like you know. And she said, I think the example that she put forward to the girl, this is how tone deaf and narcissistic this stupid woman is. And she goes, she goes, I don't walk down red carpets saying I'm black. I'm black, I'm black all the time.
Yeah, yeah, you're too much.
And it's like, what are you? What are you trying to do like like you?
It it's just.
There's nobody there to keep these people that are judging this show in check you. Know at least. On idol, you know Paula Abdul obviously had a crisis of conscience and would just get hammered all the time. Like.
And like I'd probably, I'd almost jump in and. Go. Oh well. There's a whole production crew and stuff, but. She's the creator. She's the boss. This is her brainchild. So, no, I blame her. There was another one where they asked contestants to wear makeup that made them look like different ethnicities. So effectively black face.
Ohh my God.
Oh my God.
Yeah, yeah. They dressed. They dressed as homeless women. They posed as homeless women with actual homeless women in the.
I I think I need to go and watch it.
Yeah, yeah.
Background for a photo shoot.
Did they get any? Of them to do a performance on red faces on a Saturday.
There were two cycles where models had friends who'd recently died. Ohh God and they got the back story about the dead friends and then the models had to pose as corpses. They did death themed photo shoots. One girl. Her, her close friend, had passed away and a week or two later she had to pose in a. Coffin. It was a different time.
It's it's a different time. That's that's outrageous.
The best bit, the best bit, our North Star decides to jump in. He was he was at an event. Well, no, there was an event and you know how when the the reality shows get really big, the reality stars get to go to these exclusive VIP events with real celebrities.
Ohh 5050%.
They got to go.
To a party that $0.50 was at.
And one of them kept annoying him. It was.
It was at.
A very fancy hotel. It was outside having cocktails. By the pool.
So just like hey, fiddy, fiddy, fiddy, fiddy, fiddy fiddy fiddy, fiddy, fiddy, 505050505050505050.
Yeah, they kept following him around.
He pushed her into a pool.
Amazing. I wish it was Tyra, though that would.
Have been better. And so when it hit Netflix during lockdown. A lot of people as you'd. Expect gone on the Twitter and started. Having conversations about how how problematic the show actually is, I think was it, Janice Dickinson. I think she was. A judge on. One or two cycles and maybe she.
Well, she had her own show after a while.
Was a guest judge.
Wasn't, didn't she? Yes.
There was. She had. Something to do with it and there was. An interview. And she. Was saying I agree, I agree it it. It's very problematic. I don't. Know if she disagreed with the stuff at the. Time. But she had a. Fair bit to say, yeah. So then. Tyra thinks she should get on the Twitter and respond, and she says. Been seeing the posts about the insensitivity of some path and TM moments, and I agree with you. Looking back, those were some really off choices. Appreciate your honest feedback and I'm sending so much.
Love and virtual.
Hugs. That was the way she responded. I appreciate your feedback.
She's just such a narcissist.
Love and hugs lol.
That's the thing. She's such a narcissist. I don't know how we can erase these types of people from our society, and that's that's that's I. I'm sorry. I don't wanna sound like I know how that sounds. But like any piece of literature that you read about having to cope with narcissism or narcissist is all about how to live with them. And it's like, why can't we just dig a massive hole and throw them all in it and then walk away in the other direction? I I can't stand them. I think the the best thing if you go back to that, Naomi Campbell. Thing where she had the she was it on her talk show. It was on.
It was on her Tyra's show so years later, she invites Naomi onto the show.
Because they.
You did she? She reckoned that Naomi Campbell was excessively cruel to. And hard to work with.
Look, she may.
Have been we weren't there. I don't know. Maybe. Yeah, it's highly likely, but. I think the media blew. It out of proportion, it's that.
I just I feel like.
Whole pitting women against each other. It.
Cycles or not, cycles or not?
Was low.
Flight out of.
Proportion, I think. But you know, Naomi probably had a problem with her for very good reason. When you look at some of this evidence here.
Presented to us on Americans just.
Thinking I just think.
Top Model. Ohh.
Like I know what I'm like.
See why she might have a problem with you?
I know what I'm like when I'm hungry. OK. So, I mean, you take. A room full of models.
But this has got nothing.
To do with cycles. This is just Tyra, and then she has her talk show and she's like, I'm getting Naomi on and I am going to tell her every single thing that has upset me over. 1020 years.
Wow, we did a.
Fashion show. I don't remember what it was. Might have been Jenny or something like that in Milan and we were doing that fashion show backstage and you came up to me, right? When I was about. To walk out and you said something and. It's so funny because it was so. Surreal at the time when. You said it. I didn't think that you could actually say something like that. You said. Something like you'll never be me. Don't ever think that you'll be me and something like that. Yeah.
I said. Yes, I can't. Think that's something? I'm not that I'm very much in the. Yeah, I'm very much. I know the person that I. I am and I'm not someone to go and give myself away and say that to anybody. I've never said that. In my life.
And did that. Interview goes on for ages and it's it's it's funny because I maybe that Naomi is a narcissist as well. I don't know, but it's like she's she's brought her on as a guest to try and hash this out on national television.
I'd like to know what the invite was, though, So what was the?
In front of everyone else.
What did she tell Naomi to get Naomi to come? Because I'm sure she would have gone. Naomi, come on my show, and I'm gonna talk at you for five hours about everything you've ever done to me. Yeah. I wonder how.
I reckon it's like.
She set set. It up. Like, come on, let's talk.
I don't know.
About modelling or.
I don't know.
Come on my show and tell me. About your new book I. I wonder what the.
You think it was an ambush?
How did she? I feel like it was because the whole interview.
I don't know.
It's just her. Talking at Naomi, Naomi remains perfectly calm and. This guys.
I don't remember.
That I don't think I would have.
I I. I think it's fascinating.
Said that. And she goes.
Modelling, you know, it's not, it's not everything.
It's it. It's just.
A tiny little snippet of my life. It's it's not that important. We're not saving lives here.
There's two narcissists. Two narcissists in the room there, right? There's two narcissists. This is the gold medal event at the Gaslighting Olympics. 4th of June.
Was some big breaking news in the craft worlds.
So nothing was really happening from the 1st to the 3rd and then on the 4th of June.
No, the 4th of June in all.
Hell breaks loose.
In the craft, but it's. Not often we have some breaking craft news, but this week, 20 years ago, we did.
People were smashing windows and setting fire to the local lincraft.
Unpicking their cross stitch.
I'm picking that cross stitch. Ohh man. Crazy. Yeah, it's just bedazzling. Everything insight. Yeah.
Yeah, in anger and frustration with an emotional time. American businesswoman Martha Stewart resigns as chairman and CEO of the company she founded her media in a home making empire, Martha Stewart living. Omni media, not just any media and Omni media.
Yeah, that's a big.
That's a big title. How, what? What happened to the planning day when they were workshopping that? Yeah, well, like, what are we gonna call it? We're gonna call it Martha Stewart living Omnimedia multimedia omnimedia. As in omnipotent, as in, we are everywhere. That's. That's your ego.
Chairman and CEO.
Omni Omni.
Yeah. Yes.
I am the craft overlord.
Your ego is writing cheques that your accountants can't cash, maybe.
Well, she resigned just hours after an indictment and fraud charges were laid against her. She started out as a stockbroker, which is quite interesting. As we move through, the reason why there was fraud charges, she started out as a stockbroker. She.
Was also a model.
Yes, and I've.
Back in the day.
Always thought she's kind of hot in a crafty kind of domestic bliss. Kind of.
Yes, yes, well they, yes.
Way. So there you go. She was a model, yeah.
That's why she was a model then in the 80s, she released a number of successful cookbooks. In 1990, she signed with Time Publishing Ventures to develop a new magazine called Martha Stewart Living Cause. Her cookbooks were quite successful, so they saw an opportunity there and gave her a magazine and then off the back of that they started a television show. I think that was also called Martha Stewart living based on the magazine. She was on the Today show. We had guest appearances as you do on the early show. She did prime time holiday specials.
She was a go to she's like America's mum, you know. She'd she'd teach you how to cook a meal. She'd show you how to dine your sock. She do all of those sort?
Of things, yes. And then in 1997, she purchased all of these different Martha Stewart Bits and pieces like the magazine, the TV show pulled it all together into the the media. That's. Yeah, we now.
Know and love.
Yes, yes, yes.
She was chairwoman, president. And CEO of the company. But then on the 4th of June, it all unravelled.
Did the Securities and Exchange Commission filed securities fraud charges against Martha Stewart and her former stockbroker, Peter Bacanovic. The complaint, filed in federal court in Manhattan, alleged that Stuart had committed illegal insider trading when she sold stock in a biopharmaceutical company. I don't know if it was part of the. Omni Media or not? Imclone Systems Inc she was into cloning. Martha Stewart was into cloning.
I'm not surprised.
Hmm, whack that in your cookbook. That was in 2001, after she received an unlawful tip from her stockbroker, Peter Bacanovic. Or bacanovic bacanovic. Cannabich but can it doesn't matter. They also allege that Stuart and Peter subsequently created an alibi for the in cloned sales and concealed a whole bunch of facts during SEC and criminal investigations into her trades.
There was also an indictment. Charging them criminally for their false statements about the trades. Now Imclone, despite the name, wasn't all about cloning it with biopharmaceuticals, which I think they specialised in oncology medicine. So treatments and prevention of tumours and cancers.
What? Ohh that's.
You know, rubbish. It's a front for cloning. There's like, there's actually 7 interchangeable Martha Stewarts. That's why she she's still.
That's why she's every that's why it's Omni media.
Alive to this. That's why she's only menius. She's.
That's why she can watch.
She that's why she is the craft overlord.
Because there's fifty of her.
You've hit the nail on the. We're these are all allegations. This is all allegedly, but she's cloned herself and that's why she can be. Everywhere, all at.
Once. That's why she's an Omni media inclines drug.
The Martha Stewart multiverse.
Incline developed a drug for the treatment of collector cancer and head and neck cancer, and it was before the FDA so the Food and Drug Administration for approval, right. So the FDA were due to make an announcement on whether or not this drug was approved in two. 1001. Just before the announcement was made, a bunch of executives sold their stock. Now this includes this includes in clones founder Samuel D Waxell, who was arrested on insider trading in 2002. He sold his stock. He instructed his friends and family to sell their stock, his daughter.
They all started jumping ship.
Told her she made, I think 2.5 million. The father sold his for 8.1 million. Yeah. And then Martha sold her.
Well, cause Peter Peter's got wind of it. He's he's seen the writing on the wall. He's looking at all these people because he's a stockbroker himself. Yeah.
Well, Peter is a stockbroker for the Imclone peeps as well, so he sees them selling their stuff. He calls up Martha MA or the Martha's and says silly stuff. Something's going down.
Yeah, yeah.
That's what I'm saying. She's he's like Martha. He's like which Martha? Which Martha am I talking to today? Umm. We are legion.
So she sold all of her shares? Yeah, I think 3928 shares in total. The very next day, the day after she sells her shares, the 28th of December, Imclone announced that the FDA had decided not to accept their application. They were rejected. And by the close of trading the next day.
Fancy that.
The stock dropped 16% to $46 per share, so by selling when she did, Martha avoided losses of around $45,000.
That's not. That much.
But when you're looking at the when you're looking at Omni media, Martha, yeah.
I don't know that. Yeah.
I don't think 45 K like she just have that in her bedazzled Perth.
It's not.
Look in hindsight exactly like it's chump change for Martha Stewart. She is worth millions. Possibly. Well, I don't know if she's worth billions, but she's definitely worth millions. I mean, she's, you know, omnipotent, Omni media, she's, you know, working towards God like status. And in the states, she probably has God like.
In coins.
45.
Status. So it really I think this was just a an exercise in a bit of a brain snap bad judgement on Martha's behalf. I mean, she's had advice from a stockbroker. He's gonna sell those shares. She's like you're a. Stockbroker. Right. Oh, hmm.
And it's funny that you say God like status because at the time I was working at a summer camp when this all went.
Yeah, yeah.
Down and at the summer camp, you could teach different things. So there are all the cool jocks that were teaching things like basketball and volleyball and softball canoeing. Yes, I taught swimming I did.
Right.
I didn't know I was meant to teach swimming, but I. Ended up teaching swimming. Not very well.
Young the.
Rock type No, I know. Well, I thought I was gonna be a lifeguard, and they told me. I had to teach kids how to swim and that's alright cause I.
Ohh really? Did they give you one of those red blue things? Did they really?
Did they? Yes, just like on Baywatch.
And when you were like, just parading around as a lifeguard, were you just singing that theme song in your? Head. Ohh no.
I'll be there. OK. Anyway, they had the jobs. Yeah. And then you had the crafting teachers and the crafting teachers taught things like ceramics and knitting.
Right.
And cross stitch and tapestry. This goes down. They lose it. They were crying. They're in the craft shed, crying in like cross stitching memorial pieces to Martha. They didn't know what to do.
Right, yeah. They would have. They would been like, listen, we're gonna have to sacrifice a couple of these children on our. Altar to Martha Stewart. Yes, because they. They'd have altars to us. Yeah, exactly.
That they were friends with the convicted felon they. Didn't know what to do, but it was. It was big news. And it never would have come to life if Doug's the assistant of Peter hadn't told investigators.
I'm good on you, Doug.
So he was having a chat and he just offered up the information to investigators.
Wow. And then they're, like, hang on, Doug, there's something in this. Wait.
You're talking about the marthas the marthas.
Yeah, we're going after Martha. So while all this is happening, she does an interview with Diane Sawyer about her maybe having to. Go to prison.
I think I will win this case and be proven innocent of any wrongdoing, yes. At my age. There's no time for an unexpected, undesirable, unwanted hiatus. One that you can't really.
Control, Martha. It is possible that you could be sent to prison for up to 30 years. Are you scared?
Who wouldn't be scared? Of course I'm scared. The last place I would ever want to go is to prison. And I don't think I will be going to prison though.
That's incorrect, Martha. I'm sorry.
I love it how she's like gaol. I ain't got time. For that.
Ain't nobody got time for that. You got hard time hard.
I've got lots of things to do in my Omni.
Time just do not have time.
To go to gaol.
Send one of your clients. You'll be fine, yeah.
So she was found guilty and sentenced on the 16th of July, 2004 to five months in prison, five months of home confinement. Remember, she had the tag, the ankle, the ankle bracelet.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm sure she.
Have crafted something or bedazzled it.
And made it look fabulous.
Ohh to make it look fancy well so I'm sure we'll revisit that in a later episode as well because it was big news at the time and the whole saga goes on and on and on. But I I think Martha Stewart in prison would be pretty crafty. So I'm I'm thinking maximum security because you know if if you give her like I don't. Know a shoe. And maybe like a toilet paper roll or something, she's she's gonna figure a way to MacGyver away. Yeah. There's, like, it's MacGyver and Martha Stewart, you know.
Look at MacGyver. Who way out.
She could finger knit some kind of thing to. Climb down the side and.
Exactly. Fingered in a ladder. You know, she could probably. I mean, she could carve a ship out of soap. No dramas. You know, it'd be a worry. Anyway, it's it. Look, it's. I mean you. I do kind of feel sorry for it because it was only over 45 grand. I mean.
Yes, definitely.
45,000 going to gaol for that.
Having said that, I I'm pretty sure that her prison stay was exceptionally cuz. And it did buy her a lot of cred, especially amongst people like one. Snoop DO Double G, who befriended her at the roast of Justin Bieber. I don't know. So they and they actually became really good mates. So she she was sitting next to Snoop during the Bieber roast, the actual record. While they were there, live went for something like 6 or 9 hours or something, and Snoop Dogg was smoking joints through the whole thing and and Martha was there breathing the second hand smoke and just getting pretty chatty with Snoop Dogg. So they were chatting back and forth and they forged this friendship that got the idea into the heads of a few TV execs that they should do a show together.
Snoop Dogg.
And they got wind of that and said, Nah, we'll talk to each other and we'll sort that out amongst ourselves. And so I think it was called, like, Martha and snoops potluck dinners or something. And there's been tonnes of tonnes of celebrity guests like like I. You know well, Paris Hilton was on one episode and they made mulled wine.
Ohh Martha, what will you be making for us to drink?
Today mulled wine and it's very.
Traditional at Christmas time, this is the Martha wine company.
First, you make a sugar syrup. Some star anise. Do you know what? Star anise is what?
I've never seen it before in. My life said.
And this is an Asian spice that I Asian spice. It is. It's like a starfish, but.
Agent who? What is it like a starfish?
It's is it. A lot. No, it's a spice. And then. A whole bottle of wine.
I like this show. I love it.
And then bring that to a simmer. And then here's the here's the wine itself.
I feel like I'm on an old Western movie. The way you pulling this in the cup.
Have you never had this type?
Of wine. Never. It's so. Good. Thank you so much. So it's the success and nothing left.
Ohh yeah, that's in my.
Body you don't like this? This is good.
It's opened up my whole nest. I may need some things before I start. Wrapping it.
Mulled wine is a spicy wine.
I'm gonna have to call this drink and Mariah Carey, because when this is the what all I want for Christmas is to lay my hot *** down somewhere.
Yeah, it's a. It's a cheesy show, but it's a good show. And I mean, if anything, it's probably propelled her even further into the hearts and minds of thousands more people across America because of the credit that she's got for hanging out with people like Snoop Dogg. You know he'll do. Anything for a buck, really.
Well, when she went to gaol, there's a lot of speculation that it would end her media empire, but.
It was the.
Biggest comeback and her company returned. So I think 2005 was because she had a couple of years probation as. Well, 2005 was. When she started her comeback campaign and then in 2006, her. Company returned to profitability. She rejoined the board of. Directors in 2011. Then and then became chairwoman once again in 2012. Yeah. And the company was in acquired by Sequential Brands in 2015. Yeah. And a. Couple of weeks. Ago, she became the oldest Sports Illustrated swimsuit cover model at age 81. Did you see that? It was all across the media? She was looking.
Stunning. Ohh my God. You know what? I. Would have loved to have seen her do a cameo in a. Show like prison break or something like that. So there you. Go all done. All done for the year. All done. For 2003, we come.
See you later, 2003.
Back 2000. And four new year us, are we?
Ohh, we're gonna have new new intro. I've gotta try and fix the tape and the logo. Remember we committed to that.
Ohh yeah.
I've gotta get on pixel. I don't have Photoshop, I've got the poor man's Photoshop. Pixelmator. I'll jump on pixelmator and see if I can join the the the tape in the. Cassette to make it more plausible.
Probably 3/4 through this sort of Christmas New Year break now and how many things have you crossed off the to do? OK, that's a problem. But but you guys, you're all on our To Do List for next year. Let me tell you. Hey, hey, hey. Tell your friends we'll be back. Don't you worry about that. We have nothing planned as of yet. Because this is a pre record and we're still having a bit of a break. But I can assure you.
Ohh, new year. New off. Look out.
Maybe see ya. Bye.
For taking the time to rewind, join us next time for another week. That was 20 years ago. In the meantime, come and reminisce on the socials search for T -, 20 podcast on Facebook, Instagram and TikTok.